Monthly Archives: May 2022
How Cemetery Services Begin the Healing Process
Memorial and funeral services are intended to preserve the memory, celebrate, and share the life of the deceased in a healing, healthy way. Planning a memorial after a service at a cemetery in Charlotte, NC, or at some other location, is one of the best ways that the bereaved can not only say goodbye to their lost loved one but also so they can begin the healing process.
How can planning a service help? One of the best things about our modern world is that traditions aren’t as rigid as they once were. This means that you can make a service for your lost loved one whatever you want it to be. You have the flexibility and freedom of choice necessary to honor your lost loved one in a way that’s just as unique as they were.
The following are just some suggestions for planning service, so feel free to go in a different direction if it’s what you feel is best. The first step in planning a service is choosing a location. This can be a funeral home, cemetery, church, or any other location that has meaning to you and your family. Some popular service locations include funeral homes, beaches, lakes, backyards, churches, golf courses, restaurants, and even local parks. Whatever location you choose, just be sure that it can fit the desired number of attendees and that is has the necessary amenities to meet your needs, from electricity and microphones to bathrooms and chairs.
You also need to consider music. Music is very important when it comes to services. Take some time to think about what kind of music will be best for your service and what kind of music will best reflect the deceased. Don’t forget about the guest list. You can host a service of any size, from an intimate moment with close family to a large event with the entire community in attendance. Just be sure you take some time to consider the space you choose and how many people will fit.
What about multimedia presentations? Our modern world has afforded us the benefits of technology, including multimedia presentations that can share memories of your lost loved one. Plus, these presentations are wonderful ways to preserve all your favorite memories in one simple place. Put together a presentation with photos, video clips, and music. And finally, think about guest participation. Guests don’t have to be simply attendees – they can also participate in the service by doing things like telling stories about the deceased, lighting candles, scattering ashes, or helping to release doves or butterflies.
These are just a few tips to get you started on planning a healing service. Remember, every person is different and therefore every service can be different, too. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box to honor your lost loved one.
Do you want more tips or information on Charlotte, NC cemeteries? We are here for you. Stop by and visit us or give us a call today to learn more about what we can do for you in your time of loss.
Rituals for After the Cemetery Visit
Rituals go a long way towards easing grief after a loss and a cemetery service in Matthews, NC. But how do you perform a ritual? What do they even look like?
A ritual is defined “a repeated pattern of behavior performed at specified times”, and it often includes the use of symbols, rites, and actions.” They offer benefits like creating community, providing space to grieve, giving a sense of control and many, many more. They can also be almost anything. Want some inspiration? Use this list of rituals:
- Share Memories – Create a memorial website or use the deceased’s social media to share memories of the deceased and have other people share theirs as well. This gives everyone a space to grieve and heal together.
- Carry on Existing Rituals – Maybe your lost loved one had rituals of their own, from eating in a certain restaurant on a certain day or just regularly watching a TV show. Carry on these rituals to feel connected to the deceased.
- Start a Grief Journal – Grief journals are so simple and yet so powerful. Creating ritual of writing in your grief journal at a certain time of day or for a certain length of time can go a long way towards providing comfort, familiarity, support and routine in the turbulent time of loss. If you don’t know what to write, try with letters to your lost loved one, what you did that day, or even just how you feel in that day or moment. There is no right or wrong way to journal.
- Memory Boxes – Gather photos, clothing, and other mementos of the deceased’s life and place them all in a box. You can even include poems, quotes or other writings or art that remind you of your lost loved one. Once made, you can revisit the box at certain times of year.
- Host Gatherings at the Deceased’s Favorite Place – Whether it’s a park, workplace, restaurant, or dream destination, hosting a gathering at the deceased’s favorite place will help you remember their passions and create familiarity.
- Plant a Tree or Garden – Living things are comforting, and the act of planting and caring for them is very ritualistic. Every time you water the plant or garden you can remember your lost loved one.
- Try Meditation – Guided grief meditations are an easy way to jump into a new ritual. There are tons of options on YouTube, Spotify, and other libraries. If you want to try meditating in person, try a local yoga or meditation studio. Meditation can provide calm, peace, and comfort in the weeks following a loss.
There is no right or wrong way to do a ritual or even a right or wrong ritual to try. Do whatever makes you feel supported and grounded in your time of loss.
We are here to help if you want to learn more about grief rituals or Matthews, NC cemeteries. These are just a few of the many, many different rituals you can perform after you lose a loved one. Call or visit us for more information.
Celebration of Life
Most people have been to a traditional funeral at a cemetery in Huntersville, NC, but celebrations of life are non-traditional services that, rather than mourning a loss, remember and celebrate a life well-lived. They give attendees a chance to say goodbye by sharing stories and memories and then laughing and smiling about those stories rather than crying over them.
Since celebrations of life aren’t rooted in long traditions, they can be whatever the bereaved and the deceased want. The best thing about celebrations of life? They have no rules at all. They can be whatever you want them to be! Unless, of course, the deceased left specific instructions for their service. But if there are no rules, how do you go about planning one? Where do you start?
Here are some tips to help you plan a celebration of life. Start with the guest list. Who do you want to invite? Keep the guest list small if you want an intimate celebration or open it up to the whole community if you want a large celebration. Once you have a rough idea of how many people are going to attend you can start to choose a location. Some celebrations of life are held at traditional places like churches, funeral homes, and banquet halls, but others are held at much more unique locales. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box: campfires in the woods, dinners at restaurants, services in a field, or even just a backyard barbeque. Next, think about the service itself.
You also need to do some planning for how you will honor and celebrate your lost loved one. Generally, celebrations of life have some kind of officiant or MC that leads the group in memories, speaks about the life of the deceased, and ushers the ceremony along. However, you can also have a more informal ceremony without a specific leader. If you go this route, consider passing out programs so guests know what to expect, where to be, and what to do.
What about activities? A celebration of life can be full of a range of activities to help remember and honor the deceased. Some common activities are scrapbooks or memory boards, reading the deceased’s favorite literature or listening to their favorite music, watching memorial tribute videos, and eating the deceased’s favorite foods. Remember, a celebration of life is a celebration. As such, it should be uplifting and fun. Don’t shy away from good fun, drinks, and even decorations like balloons and streamers. They are interesting, unique and heartwarming ways to celebrate lives.
While there’s nothing wrong about being comforted in tradition, there is something to be said for going a different route: a celebration of life. We are here to help if you want more tips on planning celebrations of life or on Huntersville, NC cemeteries. We are honored to do to however we can in your time of loss and celebration of a life well lived. Call or visit us today
The Power of Rituals
Services at cemeteries in Charlotte, NC and, in fact, the entire funeral service industry are built on traditions. Most of these traditions originated in religion, be it Judaism, Christianity, or another belief system. But with religion on a downslide, what will take the place of these traditions? How can those suffering from a loss find richness and meaning in death?
Rituals might be the answer. A ritual is defined “a repeated pattern of behavior performed at specified times”, and it often includes the use of symbols, rites, and actions.” Rituals have long been used in both religious and general cultural situations. Take, for example, Día De Los Muertos, visiting a lost loved one at a cemetery, or performing Last Rites on someone who is dying. All of these rituals fit the definition, but they also offer lots of benefits for those that perform them.
Rituals are powerful because they offer a wide range of benefits. Specifically, they give us space to process a loss. In a grief study performed by Harvard University, researched discovered that it wasn’t just traditional rituals that helped people going through a loss. They also learned that personal rituals played a large role in helping with grief. These personal rituals might seem useless or silly to the outside word, but to the mourner they had immense meaning and healing power. Little acts from washing a car to going for a walk have the bereaved space to emotionally process the loss.
Though they reported feeling sad during the ritual itself, they mostly reported feeling better and lighter afterwards. Rituals give us a feeling of control. We don’t have much control over life or death, but rituals help us feel like we have control, which can go a long way towards comforting us. In that same Harvard study, the participants that performed a ritual reported feeling that “things were in check’ and less likely to feel ‘helpless’, ‘powerless’, and ‘out of control’.”
Rituals also bring people together. As said by expert Tracey Wallace from Eterneva, “Mourning rituals and ceremonies are meant to bring people together, to take the hands of those mourning the loss and lead them astray from isolation”. People often feel along after losing a loved one, but rituals can help them feel connected to other people and part of a community. As The Conversation wrote, “Using familiar words and actions in an unfamiliar situation can help us find our way through it”. During a grief study done by Harvard, the scientists discovered that people who experienced little or no grief symptoms within one month of losing someone they loved all performed rituals. The experts believe that the rituals helped with the grief symptoms because they gave the bereaved a chance to mourn the loss, celebrate the life, and process their grief.
Rituals have incredible power for healing after a loss. We are here to help if you want to learn more about common rituals or Charlotte, NC cemeteries. Call or visit us today for more information.