An important part of the mourning process after someone dies is having a service of some kind after a service at a cemetery in Matthews, NC. This tradition has been going on for thousands of years because services allow the bereaved to gather together and support one another in their grief by remembering their lost loved one. But now we’re in the middle of a pandemic.
With safety guidelines asking people to stay apart from one another, how can the bereaved gather to mourn their loss? Graduation ceremonies, weddings, birthday parties and other big events can be postponed, but funerals and memorials are different. How can you have a memorial or funeral during a pandemic?
Unfortunately, some traditions will need to be let go, at least for now. Comforting the bereaved through hugging, handshakes or other physical touch isn’t possible right now. The same goes for sharing a meal after the service with a large group of people and traveling long distances for the service. However, there are ways that the majority of other traditions can take place while keeping the bereaved and staff safe.
For example, look into virtual services. Though many people won’t be able to be at the service in person, they can still attend virtually. Most funeral homes or cemeteries are equipped with video streaming and recording technology to give online guests a comprehensive experience all from their computers, phones, laptops, or tablets. Loved ones near and far can celebrate the deceased safely in these trying times through live virtual services or by viewing recorded services. There are also small services. Small families are able to host small, intimate services for their lost loved one in person as most states have a 10-person gathering limit.
While it’s not the best option, the bereaved can postpone a memorial service until its safe for everyone to attend. Cremation allows the family to postpone since the body will be preserved in its ash-like state. If you choose to have funeral, you can host a small one and then have a large memorial service when it’s safe to do so.
You also need to take safety into account when planning. It’s important to keep people safe while planning a service. To do this, it’s best to limit planning appointments to two people in person, though others can be present on the phone or via video call. You can also plan the service entirely remote through video calls, screen shots, emails, and phone calls.
It is possible to have services for your lost loved one even in the time of COVID-19. While it might be different than you imagined, it will still be beautiful, respectful, and meaningful.
Are you looking for a cemetery that has the capabilities to help you plan a service that’s safe and meaningful? We are here to help. Our staff is well-trained and has the experience necessary for a customized and unique celebration that can be held at any time preferred by the family. Call us today to learn more about services in the time of COVID-19 or about Matthews, NC cemeteries.
You often have a choice as to which kind of grave marker you want There are lots of different kinds of grave markers you can choose for burial in a cemetery in Huntersville, NC, so how do you choose?
It’s important to note that there is a difference between grave markers and headstones. A headstone sometimes referred to as a tombstone, is an upright monument generally made of granite. A grave marker, however, has a flatter design and often comes with a bronze marker or inscription. You can also have a cemetery memorial marker. These are as simple as a plaque attached to a stake to mark the grave and can include a bronze plaque.
You can also start by learning the most common types. They include:
- Bevel Markers – Bevel markers are designed to lay flat on the ground at the head of the grave with the back slightly raised to create an upright illusion. They are often polished and finished with engravings, inscriptions, artwork, and other touches.
- Etched Portrait Marker – Etched portrait markers are flat or bevel markers that have an etched portrait of the deceased on their surface.
- Flat Markers – These grave markers are often the most affordable as they are flush to the ground and only about three to four inches thick. Flat markers are usually rectangular in shape and have a polished finish with the common inscriptions, carvings, and symbols.
- Sculptures – Sculpture markers are usually either a separate statue or sculped as part of the tombstone itself. They come in a variety of shapes and sizes from angels to hearts and much more.
- Niche Markers – If you choose to bury your loved one’s remains in a columbarium you can choose to add a niche marker. These markers denote which niche belongs to which person, making it easy for the bereaved to visit their loved one’s remains.
- Bronze Markers – Made out of bronze, these markers are attached to another grave marker.
- Military Marker – Veterans usually receive special grave markers to denote their military service. These markers are usually upright headstones or tombstones and are often provided by the government.
- Slant Upright Marker – These markers are simply headstones with slanted fronts. Usually between 12 and 16 inches high, the angle of the headstone makes reading the inscription easy. They can be finished with bronze memorial plaques or other inscriptions.
Don’t forget to think about what kind of material you want for your grave marker. There are tons of different materials to choose from. Bronze and granite are both popular choices because they are strong, hardy, and cost-effective. Granite is also a good choice if you want some color as it comes in colors including gray, green, white, black, red, and even blue.
We are here to assist you if you have more questions on grave markers or Huntersville, NC cemeteries. We have years of experience and are ready and willing to do whatever we can to help you in your time of loss or preplanning.
When you’re making cemetery arrangements in Charlotte, NC one decision you’ll have to make is how to mark the memorial or gravesite and one of the most common types of grave markers is a headstone. But how do you go about designing your lost loved one’s headstone?
Generally, if you’re working with a funeral director, he or she will give you pertinent information regarding that funeral home’s specific headstone purchasing and designing process. However, it doesn’t hurt for you to be familiar with the process and some key parts. Use these headstone tips to help guide you through the process:
- The Designer – Headstone designers are important as they not only give you design suggestions and letterform ideas but also play a large role in capturing the essence of the deceased. Be sure to choose an experienced designer that understands your vision and can help you create a personalized memorial.
- Choose a Budget – The first step is to come up with how much you can or are willing to pay. It’s difficult to come up with an average cost for a headstone because they vary so much when it comes to finish, size, material, lettering, artwork and other personalized features. However, don’t forget to include the costs for delivery and installation in your calculations.
- Choose a Family Representative – While everyone in the family might want to be involved in the headstone design process, having too many cooks in the kitchen can get messy. Especially when grief is involved. Its best to designate one family member or loved one that oversees the design and inscription process. That way, the process is streamlined and simplified for everyone.
- Learn the Different Kinds of Grave Markers – There are a few different kinds of grave markers that you will have to choose from. What kind you choose depends on your budget, burial plot, and style preferences. The most common kinds of grave markers include flat markers like ledgers and slabs, upright monuments like headstones and mausoleums, bevels, slants, and cremation monuments like traditional urns, columbarium, and more creative urns. Don’t forget to consider what kind of material you want the grave marker to be as well.
- Write an Inscription – The inscription, sometimes referred to as an epitaph, is one of the most important parts of a headstone. When choosing what you want the headstone to say, be sure to really take your time. Headstone inscriptions are permanent, so you need to ensure that its meaningful, personal, and something that will remain so for years to come. One way to ensure it will be meaningful for years to come is to avoid using cliches and generic phrases. While “In Loving Memory” is nice, it’s rather bland and doesn’t say anything specific about the deceased. Try using poems, quotes, or songs for inspiration.
Most people don’t understand grief at all even though everyone will experience grief after a service at a cemetery in Matthews, NC at some point. There are many myths surrounding loss and grieving that muddy the waters and, in many ways, make it difficult for people to deal with loss in a healthy way. They include:
Remembering the Deceased Means Staying in the Past
Remembering a loved one doesn’t mean staying in the past, it can mean connecting to them in a new and meaningful way that changes as time goes on. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that the only way to stay connected to the deceased is to remember past times. But your relationship with the deceased doesn’t have to stay the same. Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief states, “Instead [of a static relationship], they evolve and mature right along with us”. A healthy way of grieving a loss is to keep the deceased part of new experiences and new memories.
Staying Connected to the Deceased Makes You Crazy
How many movies have you seen where the widow is worried over and considered “crazy” for holding onto her dead husband’s shirts or talking to him at his gravesite? This couldn’t be further from the truth. Its healthy to continue your connection with the deceased. In fact, many cultures around the world have deep tradition in connecting with the deceased through rituals, songs, conversations, songs and keepsakes. The book Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief says, “remaining connected seemed to facilitate the bereaved’s ability to cope with loss and accompanying changes in their lives.”
A Death is a Loss
While people often refer to death as a “loss”, death doesn’t mean that someone is gone forever. Their memory, goodness, and even wisdom can live on through the people they met and loved in life. After all, how can you lose someone when you hold them dearly and deeply in their heart?
Grief Eventually Ends in Closure
This couldn’t be further from the truth. Grief is non-linear and generally has no end or “closure” when you can sign and move on completely. Grief can change over time, but it won’t ever completely go away. Eleanor Haley from What’s Your Grief says, “Grief isn’t something you go through, it’s something that becomes a part of you. It’s forever.”
You Need to Move on from the Loss
Often those in mourning feel societal pressure to move on from the loss. However, there isn’t really a way to move on or detach from a loss. Grief doesn’t go away. Instead, it changes. In the early months you might grieve by sitting in the dark and crying, but as time goes on you might grieve by lighting a candle once a year. Also, there shouldn’t be any pressure to leave the deceased behind. The deceased can always be a part of you and your life, even though that part may change with time.