Category Archives: cemetery
Final Disposition and Cemeteries
Final disposition is what happens to a body after death, such as burial in a cemetery in Huntersville, NC. Keep reading to learn more about final disposition and the various methods used in cemeteries and beyond.
Ground burial at a cemetery is the most traditional disposition method in the United States. In this method, the body is kept intact, generally embalmed, placed in a casket, and then buried in a cemetery. While there are many options available for cemetery burial, cemeteries are becoming crowded. You can also bury remains above ground. Above-ground burial in a mausoleum is when the body is entombed above the ground in some kind of crypt or sarcophagus. These above-ground burial types are rarer than most other final disposition options, due to limited space and far greater cost. A lawn crypt is a vault that is partially underground and holds one or more caskets, usually a family or husband and wife pair. They generally have a few steps down to enter and can often be completely covered with grass.
After cremation, there is natural burial and cremation with ash burial. A natural burial is similar to ground burial except that the body is not embalmed or placed in a traditional casket. Instead, the body is placed on the earth with a few simple wrappings to ease natural biodegradation. The whole point of natural burial is to return the body to the earth in a simple, clean way. In a cremation with ash burial, the body is cremated and the cremated remains, or ashes, are placed in a cremation urn. The cremation urn is then buried in a cemetery plot inside a cremation urn vault to protect the cemetery grounds.
You can also choose final disposition methods like cremation with inurnment. You can place cremated remains inside cremation urns and then house the urn inside an above-ground permanent resting place called a columbarium. The columbarium houses urns in niches that are either in a freestanding structure on the cemetery grounds or an outdoor wall with niches that you can visit anytime. If you don’t want to bury or house cremated remains, you can also scatter them. The most traditional scattering method is scattering the ashes in a body of water such as a river, lake, or ocean. You can also scatter the ashes in a location special to you or the deceased, such as a favorite park or landmark. Don’t forget about housing cremated remains at home, whether on display or somewhere private.
There are also many nontraditional final disposition methods available, from water cremation and body donation to body preservation and more. You are welcome to explore these nontraditional methods to see if they would work for you or your lost loved one.
Do you want to learn more about final disposition or Huntersville, NC cemeteries? We are here to help. Call or visit us today for more information on our services or what we can do for you in your time of loss or preplanning.
Tips for Grieving Well After a Cemetery Service
While grief after a service at a cemetery in Charlotte, NC looks different for everyone, there are helpful tips that can help you cope with your loss. You’ll still always miss your loved one, you can look forward to a healthy, productive, and meaningful life if you allow yourself to grieve fully and openly.
To begin, take care of yourself. Put yourself and self-care first and you grieve. Don’t be afraid to turn off your phone and have quiet time or reach out to loved ones or friends for support when needed, binge-watch that TV show, or do whatever else you can do to help yourself feel better. Memorials like headstones are wonderful for grief as they provide a concrete place where you can go to remember and honor your lost loved one. You can set up a traditional memorial like a headstone, or you can create something more unique like a bird feeder, memory jar, painting, engraved heirloom, or even just a scrapbook filled with photos and memories. It can also be very helpful to write down the thoughts and feelings you have as you grieve. A journal is a space, a private space in which you can freely express yourself.
You also should exercise! Physical activity is wonderful for reducing the symptoms of grief. Take time to move your body in whatever way feels good, whether that means going for a walk, taking an exercise class, or even just dancing around your living room to your favorite music. Try honoring old traditions. While trying new things is great for grief, so is honoring and remembering the old traditions you had with your lost loved one. Considering doing some of the things you used to do together, whether alone or with another loved one or a friend. Facing the loss and your grief is incredibly difficult, but it must be done. Ignoring your grief and its associated feelings will not make them go away but will instead make them harder to deal with down the road.
Don’t be afraid to accept the changes in your life and try something new. Your life will change because of your loss, and resisting these changes will only make them harder. Take steps to make sure these adjustments are positive and healthy, like taking time for yourself and moving slowly. Consider trying a new hobby or pastime to remind yourself there is always the possibility for happiness and fulfillment even after a loss. You can try traveling, taking a class in a new skill, or even getting a new pet. You also need to prepare for and accept the symptoms of grief. When we grieve, our brains release hormones and chemicals that cause physical, mental, and emotional symptoms throughout the body. Be prepared for symptoms like brain fog, pain, or anxiety, and accept them as they come so they will leave when they’re ready.
If you process your grief, you can look forward to healing in your own time. We are here to help if you want more information on grief or Charlotte, NC cemeteries. Call or visit today to learn more.
Decorating a Cemetery Gravesite
Decorating your lost loved one’s gravesite at a Huntersville, NC cemetery is a great way to remember their well-lived life and honor their passing. But do you know where to start when it comes to decorating a gravesite? Here are some uplifting and unique gravesite decoration ideas to inspire you for your loved one’s final resting place:
- Floral Saddle – A cemetery saddle is a flower arrangement resting on a metal “saddle.” It has legs so it can balance on top of the headstone.
- Solar Flowers – Solar flowers are fake flowers that light up at night after charging throughout the day in the sun.
- Personalized Flower Vase – Instead of a standard vase, invest in a personalized one that features a special message to your loved one, an etching, or any kind of meaningful inscription.
- Memorial Candles – Flameless battery or solar powered candles are just as beautiful as real candles, but are much safer and longer-lasting.
- Personalized Photo Lantern – You can order custom lanterns that are printed with a photo of your lost loved one. Place a flameless candle inside the lantern and leave it on the grave to light up at night.
- Fresh Flowers – Even a simple, fresh bouquet that you leave once a week mean a lot. Plus, they give you a chance to visit the gravesite often.
- Preserved Flowers – Keep the flowers on your lost loved one’s grave fresh forever by preserving them. Order a custom preserved bouquet in resin, or purchase a paperweight orb with flowers inside.
- Candle Figurines – Buy a candle figurine that holds any candles you choose and represents a meaningful image, like an angel, animal, or symbol. You can even repurpose an old jar or mason jar by filling it with candles or twinkle lights.
- Homemade Tributes – Nothing is more meaningful than a homemade tribute like handwritten notes, paintings, drawings, or even typed up poems or memories.
- Memorial Stones – Stones have been used in memorialization for centuries. There are even examples in the Bible. Paint a stone yourself or order one online.
- American Flag – If your lost loved one was a veteran, plant an American flag or the flag of their armed forces division.
- Grave Blankets – Grave blankets are painted with grass, foliage, or flowers so they can make the grave green and lovely even in the winter months when it’s too cold for fresh plants.
- Personalized Flag – Place a flag in the ground near the gravesite with a personalized photo, message, or image. Add dates to make it even more personal.
- Memorial Benches – If the cemetery allows, place a memorial bench near the gravesite so you always have a place to sit and remember fond days when visiting.
These are just a few of the many ways you can decorate your lost loved one’s gravesite. We are here to help if you want more inspiration or information on Huntersville, NC cemeteries. Call or visit us today to learn more about what we can do for you in your time of loss or preplanning.
Embalming
Whether you’re having a cremation or a service at a cemetery in Charlotte, NC, it’s helpful to be aware of the basics of embalming.
Embalming is the preservation of human remains to slow decomposition and disinfect the body. The process is thought of as both an art and a science as it requires great skill and experience. Bodies are usually embalmed so they’re suitable for a viewing before a cremation or funeral service. They are also used to preserve bodies for medical purposes, whether for a laboratory or a medical school. Embalming is frequently required by state law or funeral home regulations. Some states legally require refrigeration or embalming if a body is not cremated or buried within a certain period of time after a death, while other states leave the requirements up to the funeral homes. While the exact laws and regulations vary, best practices are to bury or cremate a body within a few days of death or embalm it.
There are two main kinds of embalming, arterial and cavity, but both are usually used in the standard embalming process. Arterial embalming involves removing the blood from the veins and replacing it with the embalming solution. In other words, the blood is flushed out of the veins and arteries by the fluid. Cavity embalming is when the internal fluids are removed with tools called trocars and aspirators.
While each embalming expert might have his or her own preferred technique, here are the general steps of the embalming process. The first step is to wash and disinfect the body. The embalmer will also massage the arms and legs to ease rigor mortis and perform any necessary shaving. Next, it’s time to set the features. The embalmer sets the body’s features by closing the eyes and positioning the mouth. The eyes are often held shut by plastic caps and the mouth is usually wired or sewn shut. The next step is to inject the embalming fluids and cavity embalming. An incision is made in the right common carotid artery and the right jugular vein in order to pump about two gallons of a formaldehyde solution through the body. As the solution is injected, it pushes the blood out of the veins and into a drain attached to the jugular. Bodily fluids and remaining gas are removed from the internal organs, like the bladder, intestines, and stomach, by a suction hose and a trocar. A trocar is an instrument with a three-sided point attached to a tube for removing fluids. After the fluids are removed, the embalmer injects embalming fluid to preserve the body and help it hold its shape.
Finally, the embalmer then closes up any incisions made in the embalming process, gives the body a bath, and then dresses it. After about 24 hours, he will return to seal the incisions with a bonding adhesive to prevent leaks, apply makeup, and fix the hair.
We are here to help if you have more questions on embalming or Charlotte, NC cemeteries. We’re happy to offer our expertise and compassionate services in your time of loss or preplanning.
Getting Through Grief
The death of a loved one, their service at a cemetery in Matthews, NC, and the subsequent grief will never be easy. Use these ideas to soothe your pain and grief after the loss of a loved one, such as seeking help from a professional.
You also need to take care of yourself. It’s easy to let self-care fall by the wayside when you’re grieving. However, you shouldn’t add physical ailments on top of your mental pain. Take care of yourself by eating regularly and healthfully, getting plenty of rest, exercising when you can, sharing your feelings with others, and allowing yourself to cry. Be aware of clinical depression and watch out for complicated grief. It’s natural to feel depressed after a loss. In fact, many common symptoms of grief are the same as those of clinical depression. However, there is a difference between grief and clinical depression, and clinical depression does require professional help.
Be on the watch for signs of clinical depression like your sadness does not subside over time, you feel hopeless or even suicidal, as though life will never get back to normal, you’ve pulled further and further away from your friends and family, and no grief-coping strategies seem to have worked for you. Complicated grief is when you’re unable to move on after a loss. While grief does not have a fixed duration, it does generally ease with time. Complicated grief, however, involves prolonged and painful symptoms that prevent you from accepting the loss and living a normal life again. If you feel you might have complicated grief, seek help from a professional.
Speaking with a mental health professional like therapist or counselor can be very helpful and comforting in a time of loss and grief. If you’re unsure if you need to speak with a professional, take a moment to be honest with yourself and your situation. There is no shame in getting help.Don’t forget to seek support. Feeling of loneliness are very common after a loss. In fact, they’re natural. While it’s noble to try to stand on your own during this difficult time, you don’t have to do it alone. In reality, its actually better to lean on others when you’re going through a loss. Try interacting with friends, family members, or other people in your community to remind yourself of the love, support, and positivity that surrounds you. If you can, fight the urged to isolate yourself. Even if you don’t want to talk about your grief, just spending time in silence with others can be helpful. If you’re not comfortable looking to friends or family for support, you can try a local support group.
Remember, just as no two people will grieve the same way, not all of these tips will help everyone with their grief. Do what works for you and what makes you feel healthy, happy, and that you’re moving towards healing.
Do you have more questions about grief or Matthews, NC cemeteries? We are here to help.
Do You Have Questions About Pallbearers?
As intense or scary as the job of serving as a pallbearer seems, it’s not as overwhelming as you might think. A pallbearer is someone that helps carry or officially escorts a casket during a funeral or service at a cemetery in Huntersville, NC.
Their duties traditionally consist exclusively of carrying the remains from the hearse to the church or funeral home before the service, and then back into the hearse after the service. If the remains are to be buried or inurned, the pallbearers also carry them from the hearse to the final resting place. If you were you asked to be a pallbearer for someone’s funeral, here’s everything you need to know about pallbearers in order to prepare you for the task:
What Should Pallbearers Wear? It’s best for pallbearers to dress conservatively, ideally in a dark suit and tie, dress, or pantsuit. However, be sure to wear clothing that is comfortable enough for you to move and lift in. Don’t forget to wear flat or low-heeled shoes so you don’t trip while carrying the casket.
Who Can be a Pallbearer? Pallbearers can be anyone the bereaved or deceased choose. However, they are usually close family or friends like siblings, older children or grandchildren, colleagues, or friends. And yes, women can be pallbearers even though it doesn’t happen very often.
Can You Have Pallbearers at a Cremation? While pallbearers are traditionally used when the body is buried in a casket, people can choose to have pallbearers carry the casket at a funeral before a cremation. They can also carry or walk alongside the urn before or after a memorial service.
How Heavy is a Casket? Caskets can weigh as little as 60 pounds up to 400 pounds or more depending on the type of casket and the size of the remains inside. For example, pine caskets generally weigh about 150 pounds, while mahogany can weigh up to 250. Metal caskets, on the other hand, can weigh between 160 to 200 pounds depending on the kind of metal and the metal gauge.
How Many Pallbearers are There? While there can be as many or as few as desired, there are traditionally six to eight pallbearers. If there are six, three stand on each side of the casket. If there are eight, the extra two stand on the front and back.
What Is an Honorary Pallbearer? An honorary pallbearer is someone who will not actually carry the casket but is still recognized in some way. This title is usually used for older friends or relatives who might not be able to physically carry the casket. Sometimes people even choose to have deceased friends or family members as honorary pallbearers, as they don’t have to carry the casket or even be physically present to have the honor.
Do you have more questions about pallbearers or Huntersville, NC cemeteries? We are here to answer them. Call or visit us today to learn more about what we can do for you in your time of loss.
Serving as a Pallbearer
If you were asked to be a pallbearer for someone’s funeral or service before a cremation service, you need these tips for serving as a pallbearer for guidance and inspiration. A pallbearer is someone that helps carry or officially escorts a casket during a funeral at a cemetery in Charlotte, NC. Their duties traditionally consist exclusively of carrying the remains from the hearse to the church or funeral home before the service, and then back into the hearse after the service. If the remains are to be buried or inurned, the pallbearers also carry them from the hearse to the final resting place.
Hopefully these tips will help you calm your nerves and make sure you are ready to take on this honor. To begin, follow all instructions. Always follow the instructions of the family, bereaved, and the funeral direction. This is true even if you’ve been a pallbearer before or have different ideas of how things should go. It’s not your time to shine, it’s your chance to be respectful and honor the deceased. Also, turn off your phone. It would be horrifying to have your phone ring during the service or, even worse, when you’re carrying the casket.
Unless the bereaved specify otherwise, men should wear dark, solid suits with white shirts and conservative ties, and women should wear dark pantsuits or dresses. You really don’t want to trip when carrying the casket. Be sure to wear sensible shoes that will help keep your feet firmly planted on the ground and will be supportive when you lift the casket. Remember, being nervous is normal. It’s true that all eyes will be on you when you carry the casket, so it’s OK to be nervous. Just follow the instructions, breathe deeply, and you’ll be alright.
Turn off your phone completely or leave it in your car or at home. Being chosen as a pallbearer means that the bereaved trust you and care about you. It’s a privilege, so do your best to treat the honor with dignity and respect. This includes considering your attire. Pallbearers need to dress appropriately. Also, be prepared to lift. The main job of a pallbearer is to lift and carry the casket, so prepare yourself. Remember, it’s OK to turn it down if you’re asked to be a pallbearer by can’t physically do the job. Don’t forget to stay back and support the family. Don’t rush out as soon as the service is over. Hang around for a bit to offer support, comfort, and assistance to the family. Lastly, be on time. You need to arrive at the funeral home or service location at or even before the time specified. This way you can be as prepared as possible and not rushing or worried after a late arrival.
Do you need more guidance or assistance if when it comes to pallbearers or Charlotte, NC cemeteries? We are here to help. Call or visit us today to learn more about what we can do for you in your time of loss or of preplanning.
Hosting a Wake this Summer?
Summer wakes can be truly beautiful and meaningful, summer wakes after services at cemeteries in Matthews, NC are very popular, with everything from gorgeous weather and bright sunshine to vibrant flowers. However, the summer also comes with variables that can quickly turn a wonderful wake into a disaster, like thunderstorms, heatwaves, and lots and lots of bugs. Here are some tips for planning a summer wake that will help you enjoy all the benefits of the season without fear of any of the pitfalls.
To begin, make a back-up plan. If you still want to have your wake service, scattering event or other kind of meaningful moment to honor the deceased outdoors, you definitely need a back-up plan in case of rain or other problematic weather. Think about where you can have the ceremony if you have to move things inside or get creative with other solutions like umbrellas or fans.
You can even order programs that list the agenda for the wake service that double as fans. You can still enjoy parts of the wake outdoors to take advantage of the beautiful season, but having the reception inside will save you a lot of headaches and worry. One of the best parts of summertime is the abundance of bright, colorful flowers and rich greenery. Summer is the perfect time to go overboard with florals, especially when you’re bringing the outdoor feel indoors for an indoor reception after an outdoor wake service. You can also ask your florist about what’s locally in season for to save some money on the centerpieces, flowers for scattering, or other florals you may want for the wake.
What about serving cooling refreshments or skipping the soup course? Most wakes these days start in the heat of the day, so your guests will want something to cool them down when they arrive and during the service itself. Try serving cooling welcome refreshments right when the guests arrive so they stay comfortable and cool for the service and into the reception. Many people choose to serve food at the reception following a lost loved one’s wake. While a warm bowl of soup might be delicious, it doesn’t really work with the summer season or the summer heat.
Instead, opt for more summer-friendly dishes like salads, fresh fruit, or a cooling gazpacho. You could also host the wake indoors. Indoor wakes are always a safe bet, but especially so in the summer. You don’t have to worry about pesky bugs swarming the food, heavy rain turning the greeting line into a mud put, or an unexpected heat wave sending your guests in search of air conditioning. You can also give out helpful handouts. Think about helpful favors or handouts you can hand out to your guests to help them beat the heat, like fans or koozies to keep drinks cold.
We are here to help if you want to make your lost loved one’s service the best it can be, or if you want more information on Matthews, NC cemeteries. Call or visit us today.
Do You Have Cumulative Grief?
Everyone will experience grief at one time or another, generally after the loss of a loved one and a service at a cemetery in Huntersville, NC. However, sometimes people experience losses one right after another can lead to what is called “cumulative grief.”
Cumulative grief can occur when someone experiences more than one loss in a short period of time, causing the pain of each loss to compound each other into oftentimes overwhelming grief. The symptoms of cumulative grief include numbness, high blood pressure, sleeplessness, feeling overwhelmed, avoiding processing the losses, and processing one loss but not being able to process any others.
Here are fast facts about cumulative grief to help you understand this phenomenon and how you can get through it. To begin, all grief, even cumulative grief, takes time to work through. Don’t try and rush through the feelings even if it hurts as this may just leave you feeling overwhelmed. Don’t try to avoid the feelings, either, as they will continue to build up and cause more pain in the long run.
Remember, it’s not shameful to seek help, especially since cumulative grief can affect your physical health. Finding professional help, like a therapist or counselor, can go a long way towards easing you through cumulative grief. Grief is also cyclical. Grief, especially cumulative grief, is cyclical, meaning that one day you might feel better, but then the next you start to feel terrible again. This doesn’t mean you’re regressing or not making progress, it’s just part of the grief experience. This cyclical nature also means that you can make room for joy and happiness within your grief journey. After all, being happy does not negate the love you had for your lost loved one. Finally, cumulative grief isn’t just about death. While death is the most common cause of cumulative grief, it can also be caused by other losses like a change in friends, loss of identity, job loss, or a loss in future dreams or goals.
Grief can devastate you emotionally, mentally, and physically. In fact, it can raise blood pressure, increase the risk of blood clots, and even alter the heart muscle to mimic the symptoms of a heart attack. Age increases the risk of cumulative grief. As people get into their 70s, 80s, and 90s, they oftentimes find themselves experiencing more frequent loss of friends, family members, and other loved ones. Substance abuse can also increase the risk for cumulative grief.
People that use drugs or alcohol to numb grief oftentimes don’t fully feel their losses, putting them at greater risk for cumulative grief when they stop using the drugs or alcohol. Multiple loses can also heighten feelings. The simple nature of cumulative grief is that it’s hard. How could feeling the pain of multiple losses not be? As tough as feeling the heightened emotions all at once, it’s better than ignoring the feelings until they become too much to bear.
We are here to help if you want to learn more about grief or Huntersville, NC cemeteries. Call or visit us today to learn more about what we can do for you in your time of loss.
How to Visit Someone Who Is Dying
Death is something we will all face eventually. But what should you do if you have a friend or close relative who’s dying? While it’s hard, it’s incredibly important to visit them so you can show your love and support before your friend’s passing and service at a cemetery in Charlotte, NC.
But what should you say? How can you get through the tangle of emotions that comes with such a visit? There is a lot of awkwardness that comes from talking about death, but it may be helpful to remember that your friend or loved one might feel just as awkward about the subject. Here are some tips for what to say. To begin, just listen. Sometimes it’s more about what you don’t say than what you do say. They might just need someone to listen to them, hold their hand, and be their shoulder to cry on. After all, what they are going through is scary and overwhelming. Just being there to sit with them and let them express how they are feeling can be more than enough comfort. Also, don’t be afraid to ask questions.
Face the elephant in the room head on and ask questions about how they’re doing. They may not want to answer them, and that OK, but just having you be there to ask the questions is often comfort enough. Always let them decide how much they feel like sharing. Finally, be honest. Always be honest about your own feelings and experience. Feeling nervous, sad, or scared? Say so. Human connection is so important, and the best way to connect is through honesty. Also, don’t wait. You never know which conversation or visit might be your last, so don’t wait too long to make your visit and be sure you remain as heartfelt and loving as you can.
Don’t you want your friends and loved ones by your side when your time comes? The answer is probably yes, so you need to extend that same grace to your friends and loved ones as they pass. Also, friendship and family means being there to support a person through the good times and the bad. Yes, you may feel uncomfortable, but image how scared or uncertain they are.
Remember, this is the moment they need you the most. It’s understandable and even normal to feel uneasy or anxious about visiting with someone who’s dying. Most people have never been in that kind of situation before and therefore lack the experience and knowledge to know what to say or do. People also don’t know what to say or do because death and terminal illnesses are somewhat taboo subjects in our society and are therefore often not really talked about or dealt with.
Do you want more information on death or Charlotte, NC cemeteries? We are here to help. Stop by and visit us or give us a call today to learn more about what we can do for you.